Hi there! This is you from November 15, 2021. Idk what to say fr I feel so hurt rn. I'm sure yk why. Hayst I told myself na I'll celebrate my christmas w her but what now? I'm regretting it now. Why did I initiate the breakup? I feel so damn stupid and shi. I love her sm, how many times do I need to say that. But fudge I thought drama's like this only exist in books. I thought I'll have a good ending w her. Fck what will I do now? My happiness is gone. She's not my world but my mood. No matter how rough my day is, how hard it is? I'll just online and recharge my energy w her. Ik its all my fault. I'm so damn stupid. I feel like there's a huge hole in my heart no, scratch that I cant even feel my heart now. Tanga rin kase eh. Aalis alis then iniwan hindi pa sinama yung puso. Eugh I cant use the line "what did I do wrong to deserve this" bcs I'm fckin sure I do deserve this all. So hey, I'm sending this to my future me there in christmas. I cant send this to my future after years kasi hindi ko makita yung ako in future eh hayst I'll maybe die young. So you see I love that girl so much, she's my first love and first relationship afterall but I hope, I hope your life is fixed na I hope you dont love her anymore, I hope you're doing well and I srsly hope that you're proud of yourself. Because me? My life isn't stable, I love her and I'm suffering in every thoughts w her, I'm not doing well and I cant be damn proud w myself. Dont worry future me, I'll work hard for you. I'll try my best to be the best or atleast be good. I'll try to change myself for you my future. Yes I'm hurt rn so please consider it na it will take time for us to heal huh? Dont you ever dare try the internet shit or even be friend w someone if there's f2f. Please I suffer enough. I dont wan feel that fckin human emotion anymore. I'll work hard to be good so wag mong sasayangin. If you see this, be motivated na ipagpatuloy 'tong kung anumang paghihirapan ko for us huh. Dont deal w another drama. Love your parents. Sa kanila mo nalang ibigay lahat ng love mo. Ik we're not expressive but show it in your little way. So pano ba yan? I'll need to go now. This is my christmas gift to you. I dont love the way I am now, I hope you do the opposite. Sarili naman natin, family naman natin. Wag na sa ibang tao. This is my last message to you, yes I am a past but wag ka ng lilingon. Continue your path, focus on goal. Merry Christmas.

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